On YouTube...

A. If you do YouTube right, no-one is looking at your camera. They are looking through it. That doesn't mean you have license to use a dusty video relic that you found in the back of the potato and onion bin - you need to have a certain level of technical ability in your camera. But you don't need to have every rig, monitor, microphone, and mixer in the shop to do it. B. If you have a camera and lens that shows a clear image in good light, do your filming in good light. No-one who saw the Ektachrome Horrors of 1970's grunge movies will ever forget them, despite drink. They were greeny-grainy blue, dark and horrible. And that was the comedies. The docos were worse. We have gotten past that. We can now show clear colour and sharp focus. Most of the digital cameras will do it despite your attempts to help out. In most cases stand back and let the hooks do their work. Your chief task will be to give the automatic eye something to see and the automatic ear something to hear. C. Do you like to go to the movies and see the logos and presentation clips from 9 different production companies, holding corporations, or cult organisations marching forward out of the big screen while you are waiting for the story to start? Thought not - neither does anyone else It just uses up popcorn. Don't do it to your audience on YT. Even if you have a dynamite clip and exotic music and letters that dance an animated hora in front of the screen, it is just an impediment to people seeing what you want to show. Some of us are so old and cranky that we flick off when the adverts start. D. " Whassup, Gangsters? " is not a good introduction to a serious YouTube presentation for anyone apart from skateboarders or Chicago city councillors. Greet your viewers by all means, but your name and a brief line about what you're going to show is polite and welcome. More people will stay if it looks as though you know what you are doing. E. We are all familiar with the process of unscrewing the top off a beer bottle. We need not be shown how to do it in 4K and 120 fps Slo-Mo. Even if your camera and production system will do this, and you are dying to use the camera, resist the temptation. Hold off until you have a real story to tell. We'll wait. F. " Here's one I prepared earlier " is one of the most blessed lines in the script. We realise that you may have let the thing get away from you and find yourself earnestly filming yourself painting a door. Twenty minutes into the first coat you start to get the feeling that you may be straining the good will of the audience...but you find you cannot stop. So you paint away and talk faster. Be aware that your audience can stop with a press of a mouse button. And will never start again. The answer to this is the pre-prepared sample and the tight script. Also the seriously self-critical review of the whole segment before you send it out on the channel. Be ruthless with yourself, and don't expect anyone else to supply much ruth, either. G. Dress well, shave, clean your hands, and do your makeup - if that is appropriate. Everyone else on the television who wants to be successful does so, and it's an indication that you need to do it too. If you are not a Wiggle, dress conservatively. Light yourself well - the classic main and fill is perfectly appropriate for video as well as stills. Indulge in a hair light if you have one, or any...Look as good as you can, because that is what people will remember. H. All the above having been attended to, go out there and break a leg. You never can tell how good you may be or how well you might be received. Honest and friendly people with a good story to tell get listened to.